The Day the Bookstore Flooded and My Reading Life Changed With It
Photo: Rammiefong, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons
I want to tell you about the worst and best afternoon I've ever spent in a bookstore, and I want to start by admitting that neither of those things happened the way I planned.
It was October, three years ago, and a small independent shop two towns over from me in western Massachusetts was closing after thirty-one years. The owner, a man named Harold whom I'd spoken to exactly twice, had put a handwritten sign in the window: EVERYTHING MUST GO. INCLUDING, APPARENTLY, OUR DIGNITY.
The Pipe Burst at 2:15
I arrived at the sale late, mostly out of guilt. The place was already picked over, tables tilted under the weight of bargain hunters, and everyone had that grim, elbow-out look of people who treat a closing sale like a competitive sport. I was elbowing my way toward the poetry section — don't ask me why, I hadn't bought poetry in years — when a pipe above the back wall gave up entirely.
Water came down in a way water does in old buildings: everywhere at once, and with an opinion about your belongings. People screamed. People laughed. A woman grabbed a hardcover of Lonesome Dove and held it over her head like a shield.
And here's the thing I keep coming back to: in the chaos, books started changing hands. Not being bought — being handed. The staff, soaked and half-laughing, started pulling damaged stock off the shelves and pressing it on anyone nearby. "Take it, it's warped anyway." "Here, you'll like this, it's water-stained but readable." A woman in a green cardigan shoved a paperback into my hands before I could object.
The Book Ruth Chose for Me
Her name was Ruth, it turned out. She'd worked at the store since 1994. The book she handed me was a collection of essays by a writer I had never heard of, on a subject I had no interest in — something about rivers, I think, or maybe it was about grief dressed up as something about rivers. I said thank you because there was water dripping down my back and it seemed like the moment for gratitude.
I read it that weekend. All of it. I have read it three more times since.
Now, I want to be careful here, because this is where the essay could turn into a lecture, and nobody wants that. But I've been thinking about what happened in that store for three years, and I think the reason that soggy book landed so hard is that I had nothing to do with choosing it. No algorithm suggested it. No review had primed me. It wasn't on a list. It arrived in my hands at the exact moment my defenses were down — cold, wet, embarrassed — and it turned out to be exactly the book I needed.
What the Algorithm Can't Do
Here's what I've noticed since: most of my reading life, like most of yours, has been quietly optimized. Recommendations trained on my past purchases. Lists curated for people like me. There's a comfort in that, I won't pretend otherwise. But there's a sameness creeping in, too — a sense that my next book is always downstream of my last one, that I'm stuck in a loop of my own taste.
Ruth didn't know my taste. That was the whole point. She handed me a book based on nothing — or possibly based on everything, on thirty years of watching readers walk through a door, which is its own kind of intelligence. Call it human curation if you want a fancy word. I call it a stranger paying attention.
Since that day, I've changed how I buy books, and I mean that literally. When I walk into a shop now, I try one small thing: before I look at anything, I ask a staff member what they've loved lately. It feels awkward every single time. I do it anyway. Roughly half the recommendations have been wrong for me. The other half have rearranged shelves in my house.
What I Keep From That Afternoon
Harold's store is a yoga studio now, which he finds hilarious, or claims to. Ruth, I heard, retired to the coast of Maine, which is where all the good booksellers go eventually, like salmon. I never thanked her properly, and I think about that more than I probably should.
But I did write her a letter, care of the yoga studio, which I hope found its way. And I kept the book — water-stained, warped at the corner, the price sticker peeling. It sits on my desk, not my shelf, because shelves are for finished things and this one is still teaching me.
The catastrophe didn't change what I read, exactly. It changed who does the choosing. And it turns out that when you let go of the wheel now and then — let a stranger, a spill, a burst pipe, a piece of dumb luck pick the next book — you find out your taste was never as small as the algorithm believed.
Go ask a bookseller what they loved lately. It'll feel strange. Do it anyway.